you're a mystery yourself

Monday, January 19, 2009

9:42 AM

I'm suck a slacker!!!! yawns. i did practically NOTHING today. just teached one student and thats about it. sian~ anyhow, I need to blog. i had lots of things to blog abt say at 11pm.. after talking and chatting to so many ppl online.. i duno where to start blogging alr.

thinking about.. yes.. my future yet again!!! i need i need I NEED to know what i'm looking for!!!! maybe i should just go find a job somewhere and work there a few yrs then change job. or should i look into a career?! what about just sticking to BnJ and take up the position of a manager trainee? omg.. choices and decisions in life! yawns. i just want to go back to sec school and u know what? its all planned and placed in place.

was just thinking too... charmaine told me a story that her friend told her. now i wonder, who will be my apple picker? what if.... i change the story cuz its modernize age now, and drop when i see the apple picker of my choice?! or or OR i choose not to leave my tree when the apple picker wants to pick me?! haya... u see.. there is ALWAYS so many things to think abt! omg!! i so should start doing my essays! tell me abt a hell week ahead man! -.-

anyhow.. work is getting boring again. the travelling is not making things any fun! sigh. should i gym on wed? omg.. i met my friend on the bus tdy and i almost died cuz she told me she lost 4 kg in 1 mth! and i'm like.. I HAVEN LOST ANY WEIGHT! i should just turn to starving a few days and see how hur?! ohoh.. one of my new year's resolution.. NO FAST FOOD for the year! HAHA! i'm good okay!!! i've survived 20 days!!!! another 345 days to go!!! woot! *stay positive*

so.. 1st marathon of the year....! SAFARI RUN 2009!! in rememberence of AH MENG! well.. mayb i should go for the next one in.. may.. adidas sundown. then in july, milk run and and and then in aug army half marathon. by aug!!!! i will do my 1st half marathon!!!! *i hope i can survive and my silly knee can take it* and then... standchart 21km too at the end of the year! wow!!! MARATHONS! =D love me-

ttfn-

Fairytales..

7:28 PM

so.. people been asking me "hey cherm.. whats up with ur last post?"

well.. let me just tell you that I m in the state of confusion. when u have tons of DEADLINES to all the projects and hurdles u get from school, trying here to get ur team going, working and working. yupp... you get confused and emo about the last controllable part of ur life which in turns is not really controllable at all.

been searching for jobs. went thru quiteeee a bit. sending tons of emails hoping somehow that they will reply me soon. when ur grads are dying bit by bit.. the only possible thing to do is to cheong for the last yr. hoping that my last yr grades will overshadow all my other grades and that i get the job!! just the job. omg. *scream*

Fairytales..

7:33 AM

its all about what ifs...

what if....
what if i'm not ready to move on,
not ready to accept something new?
what if i do accept it finally and move on,
and i realise that its a wrong decision made?!
what if i don't move on,
and i realised that its a wrong choice made as well?
what if you are the one?
what if this whole thing was just a big huge cover up for our feelings?
and what if i don't think this will ever work,
but still go with it just because...
what if i'm the one for you,
but i choose not to be?
and lastly, what if we were never meant to be?

what if i'm still caring for you even till this very day?
will u say that u do too?
what if i'm just waiting
and wanting to hear from you?
what if i'm just wanting oh so badly to be ur good friend,
will u ever know that?
what if i'm here to say to you now that,
its all up to us and i'm really trying here.
what if feelings can't be kept for too long,
will you then accept me for what i will tell u in future?
what if this is all gonna come to an end,
will you tell me that u really hope it did not go down that road?
what if all i want to let u know is that,
i want to be ur friend,
will you journey with me on this road?

will this what ifs ever pass?

Fairytales..

9:52 PM

so.. i've been doing work.. ALOT of work recently. you know, the usual.. rushing for datelines... i would like to use DEADlines for now. looking at the 2009 schedule.. its gonna be like a mad year.. with trying to finish my thesis by june 20th and from july on, to job hunt like crazy! oh wells. i do hope actually that some soul will approach me. or maybe, i will just go for some course... how does neuroscience sound?! hur hur.

alright now, so i'll be getting down to churn my essay again. stil thinking of how in the world m i gonna finish the culture one. AND churning out the method section for thesis. OMG! *help*

and so.. ttfn! till we meet again on this page. -loves-

Fairytales..