you're a mystery yourself

Wednesday, May 31, 2006

7:44 PM

yesterday was a pretty kuku day. was sad in the morning, happy when i get to work n F up when i talked to jas. thats in the night. oh wells. hahaha!! now i guess i m pretty happy??

was a lazy day again yesterday. omg. y is everyday a lazy day? i can't exctly afford to have lazy days anymore. i have got stupid piano to do. oh wells. if only its not so stressful. mayb its just time management. hahaha!! i have to start working hard!! dun exactly have much time to lala around already!:))

went to work. n on my way to work.. i saw a 3 footer water monitor lizard!!! its super cute!!show u show u!!

yupp.. love it lots!! i call it LIZARD! yes! this is lizard! ALRIGHTS! i m kuku!! oh wells! just ignore me!!! HAHAHA!! n it swims like a croc!! just a smaller version of croc!! n its PRETTY!

it swims like croc right?!?!?!HAHAHAHA!!! yes.. that was the CLIMAX of my day! how interesting!

work was pretty fun. i was in kuku state. but oh wells. its not enough to actually cover my sad state. but it was alright. mayvina was high to i think. cuz of me. but not exactly high high!! hahaha!!AHLLO!!

yupp.. that was the high side to my life yesterday. in the night.. for get it man. dun talk abt it will be better.

a sense of fear.a sense of insecurity.a sense of wanting.they r slowly creaping into me.as i let the day pass by. all messed up. real messed up.somehow i feel like a fool.a BIG fool.tell me where i go wrong.where did i go right.y m i the last to know again?being kept in the dark suck. let me love u.i m messed up.live is screwed. BIG TIME screwed.no one is exactly helping.its not funbeing ms nice all the time.someone hear me out please!the more i want.the more i don't get it.the more i cry.the more they laugh.the more i see the light.the more i m kept in the dark.what do u want me to do before you let me off?where did i go wrong to deserve such thing?stay calm n be happy.i can't be myself again.the heart sinks.the pain is there.let me tell u how sucky this is please.i dun deserve this at all.i wanna let u know i m here for you.

Fairytales..

12:41 AM

i m fine. really. hahah. see, i m the happy me again!! yeah!! woo hoo~ oh wells, i do hope my happy self will last for long. HAHAH!! thanks for asking tho. NO WORRIES MAN!!! i m easy going on that matter. :))

i dun exactly want to see that person online. but i kinda still wanna see that person online. gosh.. in such a mess again!! oh wells.. hahah! i dun think i will be of any bit high for the next few days. but will still try to stay smilly somehow. GRR.... roar!

u know who i really wanna meet now? hahaha!! i wanna meet samuel! for what reason? oh wells. i duno too. just wanna meet him BIG TIME! anywayz.. i do hope he is alright man! is like, i never see u online n when i do, u nv talk to me. so its like as good as nothing.but what can i say!??!!?

oh yes.. i will be working tomorrow at GWC at 630-1030. i will be all the washing and less serving. haha!! thank god i m only doing 4 hours of cleaning. actually, there is not muich to do also. yesterday we did things so so fast! like by 1030 i m out of GWC. i think i m working at cathay next week. n also, i think i need one more shirt.

hahah!!! i m at my grand's place now. its dumpling festival again!! i love the dumplings my grand make. its YUMMY!! n also, my cousin is here FINALLY! haven seen her for the longest time ever! hahah!! n i have to remember to buy for her a pint of ice cream. lets see... hahaha!!! n paul wants an ice cream cake for cha siew bao!! oh yes. sounds a little rude to call her that tho!! now.. i will make the cake for cha siew bao?!??! i hope man!! i think i will lar. just that paul will have to collect it from GWC . n i hope that i m not working at cathay. i duno y. but i m not looking forward to it. and janice is nice yesterday. AHHAHA!! she seems so bubbly somehow after i work there for not so very long.

everyone seems depressed now. i duno why. u see... i heard that lion is not doing really well these days. i m definitely a little kuku up there. n i think i have lots to worry about. n the best thing is i duno what m i worrying for!! HAIZ!!! i only know that things seems to be a little funny these days! like real funny!

I WANT TO GO TO SENTOSA!! I WANT TO KAYAK!! alright. for these matter, yes.. i m KUKU! i admitt!! :)) oh welll.. what can i say. i haven been do9ing any water sports for the longest time ever. lets say the last was OBS?? hahah!! n i think jolene wants to go too ya?? as for carmen?? it will be a good exposure for her. if not for alex telling me that he have the card to i duno where n i duno what, i will not have want to go kayaking so enthustically. i totally forgot about water sports till alex show me his card. have been only concentrating on netball!! a good news for catherine.. I CAN RUN ALREADY!! but still not fast enough. just jogg. n my leg is gaining more n more POWER!!! is that good news or what?

i know what i really need. a TAGG BOARD!!! can someone please volunteer to help me to do?!?!?! hahahaha!!! need a taggy SOON!!! oh wells.

-ttfn- huggs

Fairytales..

10:06 AM

i want you.
i need you.
but just go away.
i try not to cry.
duno y.
it seems like its been a long long time.
i miss you.
JUST GO!!!
my heart and mouth don't coordinate.
suddently, everything seems so dark n tuner liked.
someone show me the light!
WHERE IS MY LIGHT?!?!?!

Fairytales..

10:58 PM

i m a happy girl leading a complicted life in a profound world.

piano suck!! big time! OMG! i hate katherine! ohwells. hahaha!!! its kinda my fault too. anyways to samuel: dun be sad boy. seriously, cheer up. i think whatever prob u r facing now, it can be solved. just be confident. i know u can do it! no worries okay?? -huggs-

yupp.. as i was saying.. piano suck. yes PIANO SUCK! as much as i love it BIG TIME. it still SUCK! oh manz! i m working later. hahaha!!! this makes me remember of yesterday's conversation with jori! to jori: NICE TALKING TO U MATE! yes.. its super duper nice to talk to jori. n know what? i went HIGH again yesterday! like HIGH HIGH HIGH!! Oh man!!! sorry jori. i was too high! hahahhaa!!

my life is so interesting. but not interesting too. like huh? this is so ironic! so contradicting! oh man! oh.. NETBALL! yes! uts crazy! catherine's cousins r gonna play for the street netball. as much as i dun want, i have to. i also wanna go down n support. but do u think i can?!? OH GOSH!! I WANNA SHOUT!!! i m like so freaking confused and so freaking angry n ARGH!!! help me man!! OMG.OMG.OMG!!!i m like to kuku to actually say anythingy now. i need to talk to someone!!! my mind is blank. my head is pounding. my heart is bleeding. OMG.OMG.OMG.!! okay... -breathe-

** i m so not making sense here. oh wells. just ignore me**

-u make me wanna shout
kick my heels up and shout
lift my hands up and shout
for ur love.-

Fairytales..

10:29 AM

hehehe!!! i tok to you already! i m happy! oh man!!! gosh! okay. whatever. heh! just ignore me as usual.

Fairytales..

7:08 PM

blogging about yesterday again! gosh.. i just can't blog for that day man!! got some timing wrong.. ahahaha!! anywayz. i had a GREAT time yesterday! missing the times i DON'T go to work. its just lagging around and if go out, will be till late in the night n have LOTS of FUN!

yesterday. went to collect my phone n to meet cat.. meow! haha! yes. was at wheelocks and had fun with cat n her lil bro! haha!! was pretty fun actually. both of tem were so loving the choc bis n kinda like ALMOST drooling there! oh wells. its the dabbs! what can i say? hahaha!! later on. its off to church! yes! FINALLY i m going to church!

in church, got some donations to MILK fund. very generous people. most at least. its all like ten bucks ten bucks!! pretty cool. OH!! its joe's birthday yesterday! went to have good nice food at casurina road! wow!! n trevor send my n pam home. wasn't exactly expecting it tho. hahaha!! was only hoping someone will send me n pam to the nearest MRT or along that line. but oh wells... trevor send us home. so sweet of him! love him lots! :)) actually i love all of them! yes yes!! trevor loves BnJ!! how interesting eh?!? n he LOVE to hang out at GWC!! how interesting too! i never knew it man! n he had a FAST sliming method! i hope it does work for me~ *giggles* reached home pretty late. oh wellz. i haven been getting home so late for some time already!

i just realise, its a beautiful day today! at an angle from my room window, it seems very foreign country. very nice. the sky is pretty too! OH NO!! know what? its friday today! i haven practise scales n blah blah!! n i going for late night movie tomorrow!! have to go book tics today!! DARN IT! oh man!! so much things to do n got NO TIME!! mayb just that i duno how to manage it. oh wells.

Fairytales..

8:06 PM

the next American idol is... yes.. mr hicks won!! m i surprised. hahah.. woke up so early toda just to watch the show. its a good show! really. CLAY AIKEN APPEARED!! his look is a little weird. his hair is horrible. but oh wells. hahaha!!! expect sumthing like that from a idol. he still have a good voice tho.

yester work from 430-1030. its crazy i tell u. i did the whole of outside n i also did the collars. the ice cream. i think i did almost everything. siyu only did the washing. she is slow. but oh wells. can't blame her. she's new. real new. i m so happy with the batch 14 ppl. love them lots! hahah!! too bad we can't meet today. we will meet sometime soon k!! n make sure everyone can make it!! yes yes!!! :))

affair birthday is coming soon!! real soon!! affair.. when can we meet?? u gotta get ur prezzie from me!! hahaha!! let me know ya??

i m missing that person!! really missing lots. okay.. this is real random. i duno what to blog about la. u see, everthing is the same at work. serving ppl, making them happy, hanging out with kids. i love the kids that go for ice cream. they rock! what i remb yest is that i did lots of things yesterday. really alot. never did so much before. haiz.!! oh well.. i think its time for me to do things fast.. i stilll can't run!! how m i gonna play on for the event man??!?!? help me!!! anyone.. just tell me how to recover fast. now my karf muscle is super tight. can't seem to loosen it.

missing u like i never did!! y r u so attractive??!?!

Fairytales..

7:54 PM

yesterday work the morning shift with janice. OMG. its freaky! she is so so freaky! really. oh wells. i did everything. know what? after that lavinia came at 1230. i was like.. so fast 1230 already? OMG. i think i m doing thing really really slowly! hahaha!! anywayz.. i really did learn alot from janice. she is really particular but i lie the way she does things. mayb the occasion times that i get pissed off with her cuz i dun really like the way she talk. hahaha!! sometimes it just reminds my of belinda! yew!!! oh wells.. still.. hahaha!! she is a nice person! i think i m gonna survive well in BnJ!! hehe!!

after work.. its 430. have to go to wheelock to service my phone. oh. know what? i was at that place waiting for the free shuttle n then the security guard told me that the shuttle just went!! OMG!! i had to cab there. but thank god. its not ex at all. its only 2.80. but what is it compared to FREE shuttle man??!! yupp. then went to service my phone. my phone is KUKU!! really!! they have to upgrade my phone for i duno what reason. oh no... i hope nv time there isen any of this prob again!

went to meet pam after. hahaha!!! went to shop!! :)) yes!! only window shopping! pam is crazy over her blueberry ice cream!! oh no!! she just love $1 ice cream!! hahaha!!! just like lavinia! on my way home to grands place, guess who i saw?? MARTHA!!! n FARR!!!! hahaha!! n a whole lot of many ppl to go do door knocking to find ppl who needs help i think. hahaha!!! yes. then i took donation cards from farr to sell. oh yes. please please do give generously. the kids need our help. they r poor. anywayz. yes.. i took 4 cards. hoping that i can give to someone to ask for donation too. but know what?? its very hard to get donations nowadays. i duno y. hmm... its for a good cost man!! just a dollar or 2 will be good! hmm...

anywayz, this yrs milk run will be held on july 2nd. i think its gonna be GREAT!! then after.. hahaha!!! can go have dinner. just like the other time. right jasmine??!!! i m gonna work today too. at 430 till closing. hope it goes on well! :))

PLEASE DO DONATE!! DO GO FOR THE RUN IF UR VERY ATHELATIC!! let me know!! :)

Fairytales..

11:16 PM

talking to u is the best thing in life.
somehow, you make me feel at ease.
yes. YOU!
oh wellz, i can only look at u from afar.

i went to ikea yesterday with mum. hahaha!! bought a HOT PINK roller chair. now my room looks more perfect. its witht he colour skim. yes!! i bought a new nike walking shoe too. its white base with pink words?!?!?! yes!!! i duno whats up with me n PINK!! mayb i m gonna be like bridget!! OH NO!! hahahhaa!! bridget.. now i understand y ur so crazy with pink. i m loving pink too. LOVE IS IN THE AIR! =)) mum bought me 2 pairs of dangllies too!! hahah!! love u mum!! its very pretty!! i will show u one day k?? =))

i m working tomorrow. doing from 1030 till 430. then i hope i m gonna watch da vici code. mayb if luck will be this week. next week i can work almost everyday. btw chermaine.. the week just started n ur talking about nx week. WTH?!?!?! hahahhaa!!

i think i m high on piano today. suddently i just love doing piano homework and studying piano. i duno y. dun ask me man!! I AM CRAZY!! mayb is the fact that i m gonna work tomorrow. i hope i can do things faster tomorrow. not only that, i hope i can train this week. i have to train!! i want to play in the street netball!! OMG!!

going church this week! its for sure! pam is back in a tion. but she have sum kinda prob. n i think its good for me too. hahaha!! i will then have to go home with her. i love PAM!! hehe.. missing u dear! anywayz, i hope uncle joe will not ask y i did not go for agape on sat. then.. i duno what to say man! being a catalog is not a reason for not going down to church. oh gosh. this is crazy! going to church again!! yes yes!! will be churching on thurs too. its ASSENSION already??!! oh no!! i really haven been down to church to realise that! at least i have pam to update me everytime!! hahaha!! think after going for dinner. is it pam?? i m BROKE K!!! hahaha!!

as for the netball team. i will just have to continue with what i m always doing. only to hope for the best when the time comes. its like everyone is running away from me. no one ans-es my call. reply msges. oh wells.. run run as fast as u can!! know what? i will get u one day! and we will be in action again! i hope.

its a monday today! u know what that means! yes!! piano!! then after piano.. i get to watch grey's anatomy. that is IF everything for piano goes on RIGHT! lets count the odds man! hmm... i see that i will not be watching grey's anatomy today! oh wellz.. i will update more tonight or maybb tomorrow morning b4 i go to work.

UPDATE IN THE NIGHT:
katherine did not come today!! know why?? she got food poisioning!! thats sad.. but happy cuz i got one more week extra to play my piano!! i m so gonna gonna gonna learn up man!! no more excuse chermaine.. my phone drop again. this time, by me. from the piano top to the keys to the floor. OMG!! know what? i have to now, send my phone for repair.!! oh no!! i have to part with my one mth plus old phone!! currently using 6510. its a non coloured phone. one of the phones that i really love last time. oh wells. carmen says that i use lots of man man!! really meh??!!?? hahhahaa!!! oh wells. i can't mke that a habit. have to change. hahahaha!!! working tomorrow!! happy! working on wed too!! happy! :)) i m a happy kido now!! know y?? he made my day! really!!!:)

Fairytales..

3:32 AM

i work yesterday!! hahah!! its cool man!! seriously, its FUN man!! i tell u ar!!! jasmine is cool!! not really my type but yupp.. still good to work with! janice is not that bad afterall. but she is real picky man!! can't actually stand it larr! i duno man!! its just the way she speaks i think! its just WEIRD!! anywayz, haha!! i will be working 4 days next week! will be from tues till fri. OMG! this is gonna be fun man!! know what? today is saturday! not going to church but u know what? can't exactly do my piano too! i will so be killed on mon again larr!!!

for carmen, i think she will be who cares about piano man?? OH yah man!! i hope sumtimes i get to think it her way! OMG!! i love piano but i don't?? u understand?? i m kinda talking like hpw lavinia will talk!! the kinda this but not exactly kinda thingy. hahah!!! lavinia.. ur so irritating me today!! stop that man!!! hahahaha

oh wellz, i really hope that the cuming week will be fun man!! so looking forword to working again. know what?? sammy is really soft!! but he is very cool man!! i think he is really good at this Bnj stuff! anywayz, should not always talk about work! my life dun evolve round work only right?? yes man!!! but last thiny about work.. i think BnJ is good in the trainings! TK n Edmund really make us know where bnJ is from n stuff!! everythingy about bnJ!!! haha!!! yes mom!! dun smile or laugh!! i know what u n i will be laughing at man!!

my netball team is off a little prob again!! o wells. lavinia n cat was talking to me in the bus about the netball stuff! i m so sorry darlings, i really wasn't thinking. i was hearing what u guys were saying but i m not processing! to think of it now, i think u all were pretty right about things man!! oh well, lets just see what to do about it and what will it turn out to be in the end. give me a few weeks! no worries cat.. it will be b4 the streetz netball! : ))

btw.. know how many ppl turn up for training in the end?? yes!! ur right!! FOUR!! pathatic man!! yes man!!! OMG OMG!!! i duno why but it seems to be very fun trng with SO MANY ppl man!! hmmm. i duno larr.. this is getting worst only! the best part is, when there is no events on for the yr and when there is no other decisions to be made like jersey and bibs! yes! -nods-

my ankel is so much better already! u know what?i ran for the bus 64 man!!! yes!! tknx mom for helping me stale time! hoho!!! its not exactly pain already know. its just a little weird feeling. i duno man!! hahaah!! hmm... i m gonna be real random! i miss affair n darlink.

OH!! i saw bernyce today when with cat n lavi. cat is really not herself today! i think cause she is not exactly warmed up larr! i mean, she wakes up like what time?? -smile- oh wells, she is really different now man!! hahaha!! yes bernyce.. we will meet one day!! ONE DAY!!

i duno what to type already! just that i m really loving to work. n on the other hand, i m really so so freaking screwed! cuz o my piano!! which is like OMG!! anywayz... i dun really like using this comp man!! or rather.. this keyboard! hahahah!!! sorry jeremy!! i m just not used to this kinda funny sounding keyboards and also, facing the wall to type my entry!! HAHAHAHA!!!

ttfn! =))

Fairytales..

8:02 PM

lets say today i m in real shit!! OH NO!!! lets put it this way. i m starting work today. n i think i m working with janice~ i haven practise my piano well enough n i dun think i will have any more time to practise~ on top of that, my ankle is not really helping. its very very weak n how in the world m i gonna work today??!!! yes!! i m so screwed right?!!

i m doing my piano homework now. gonna go for lunch later with cat! she ask me to wake her up but she nv ans my phone call! gosh!! she ar!! anywayz.. after lunch, i will be meeting the netball supplier with cat at my house void. hahaha!! i hope she knows how to get here man! yes. after, its off to work!! then i really hope that every thingy will be alright! god bless me man!!

i m so excited for the arrival of my baby cousin!! its a boy!!! u know?? BOY!! yes yes!! n the interesting thing is FINALLY my aunty is accepting the names that cat n i choose! yesterday is crazy man!! at midnight till one am, cat was being VERY VERY kuku!! y?? she give me funny names like makan and can and kpo!! appearently it is names for hawaii.. but OMG.. cat is really screw lose yesterday! i think the screw was lost! hahahhaa!!! my aunty like the name kaiser and cassius. finally cat say!! its like.. forever b4 my aunty like 2 names! hahaha!! must be my kinda lucky day man!!

i listening to the PCK song now. its nice hahaha!!! i haven hear the song for the longest time man!! its nice to hear now. yesterday too, i msg samuel.. hahaha.. its fun man!! he went down to watch the netball finals.! its pretty expected that HC will meet AC at the end of the day! hm.. but know what?? AC is not so good afterall! HC is better! hehe. AC there is many good netball players! lyk ppl who r from TP! hmm... i duno what is the final score. but it should be a pretty close fight. this samuel is so into sports man!! i think its not him larr.. its the school that is very closly bonded together! oh wellz! if only STC was like that!! haiz. mayb its just not meant to be this way for STC. hmm..

okay. i got to go do my final piano stuff b4 meeting cat! its gonna be a long walk for me man! hahahaha!!! tata! i will update tonight or mayb tomorrow morning. OMG!! there is netball trng tomorrow! know what?? many gonna turn up!! yeah!!! so happy!! but u also know what?? i m not trng!! just throwing many many balls!! oh no!! n coach them too i guess! :))!!

Fairytales..

7:08 PM

anissa left this morning to philippines for 1 month!! gosh!! u know how freaking long that is?? its 1month man!! so gonna miss her! had a very last minute farewell for her. just lav, me, cat, cherie and off course, anissa herself! met up at ben n jerry's for ice cream. spend alot!! know what?? these ppl.. go for ben n jerry's ice cream without bringing money! how interesting eh?yes! that bad.. i have to pay 1st. grr! anywayz.. it was FUN!

catherine wrote a LONG LONG LONG feedback letter on a napkin to BnJ! gosh.. its not nice man! i think its good to have sum complains once in the while. hoho. lavinia was really busy! she ran all around. make sure things are going on well.. etc etc! her shift mates were not at all helpful. i was pretty shock that the bubbly thingy that was the prime thing that we r hired is gone with these ppl who worked for 1mth plus plus! hmmm.

really had fun. talked laughed so much! know what? i told edmund that i will want to work this friday! n i got it!! yeah!! but its very long!! its for 6 hrs man! u know?? 6!! thats 30 bucks tho! hahahaha!! but still.... i duno if my ankel can take te pressure! i just recovered! but not totally actually! still limping. but i guess i should be alright by tmr. i think i will be working with janice n kathleen. kathleen seems very nice. according to mommy, she is professional. which is good. n janice.. hmm.. i dun really lyk her frm the start. oh wellz... its a long long story!

i don't know whats up with me blogging in the mornings about the things that happened the day b4. just seems wrong. its suppose to be blogging that day stuff right?? hahaha!!! being real random here.. affair is ill!! poor gal!! cheer up affair! i get u ice creams so u gonna be happy?? ice creams make ppl happy right?? hoho

Finally gonna work tomorrow! frm 430 till 1030. be there if u wanna be happy! i will serve u good! hahahaha!!! GWC!! oh.. i just msg shihui! awwwwww... missing her n germ lots. i duno y. just seems like we know each other for long long long!!! well.. i hope we can go out together for DINNER! i get so excited with all these activities going on! :)) so me somehow! yes yes.. after this blogging stuff.. i gtg do PIANO!! OMG! i think i will do homework today! tomorrow n sat, i dun see that i will be able to practise! oh wells! at least i already know how to play the 1st piece! good stuff man! in the night, i will have to update my very own diary! usually i will use 2 diaries in a year! this time, i m not even close to the ending!! oh wellz.... -sigh-

still missing that particular person. n shihui n germ too! i still haven really thank you jin for helping find a piano teacher called eigene! n i m broke! ppl just owe me so much cash! i m really broke now! i hope my mom dun find out! hahaha!!!

working at BnJ @ 430pm-1030pm on friday 19th may 2006! 1st time working!!!!!!!! :))

Fairytales..

7:54 PM

i wanna start work at BnJ!!!! read mommy's blog.!! mom!! it seems fun man!! argh!! i wanna work i wanna work!! OMG!! okay.. sorry. i m better already! yes!

joei ask me out for dinner. aka''date''. i duno if i should go. i think i will be free to go. but i duno y, i dun wanna go. jas say that i m despo for a date. i m not jas! is just that i always well him i can't go, can't meet and stuff. now that i m free y not man? but there is a thingy stopping me! i duno!!! so confused! did i say b4 that being confused is the worst thing that can happen? also.. confusion is good for the brain! it help work those brain muscles! okay.. sorry!

i got fried rice for lunch! i do it myself alright??!!! hahaha!!! yes!! i wanna give affair XXX but i duno what she likes! n i hope she likes it!

gonna do piano later! how interesting my life is! i hope sumone can accompany me now man! i m so freaking bored! i kinda miss him know. sadz.. i nv see him online for the longest time ever! really! n i got this other person who ask me out! OMG! confused man!! actually, there is nothing to be confused about! its very easy! dun go out lorr! dun fall in love lor! hayo!!

Fairytales..

7:20 PM

i sprain my ankel n know what?? it looks lyk a snapping turtle now!! n remember the movie harry potter n the prisoner of askaban?? yes.. my leg look lyk the fat lady that harry blow her up into. oh wellz. at least it is healing now n i can walk faster!

hmm.. i m so gonna join the streetz netball man! love it! i hope its gonna be fun man!! oh wellz.. i will have a tough time thinking who to put in to play. gosh! that is hard! imagine..my team already have so little people and i find it so fun to think who to put in to play. how about those team which have a lot of ppl?? i think they really have lots to think man!! but then again.. it mayb easier for them cuz they know who is the best! n my team.. erm... all pretty much equal!

i need a Holiday Get Away!!! hannah helpppppp!!!!!!!!! i want to go saba!!! oh well.... i think thats up to my piano performance for the year man!! i want to go genting to play!! ok.. thats VERY n SO n get away!! i want to got to a place where the beach is white n the water is clear! alex!! i need u now!! tell me how to get to pular bawah!! is it a good place to go??? hahaha!!!

i m suppose to work man!!! omg!! mom says that its hard work! oh no!! she suppose to end work at 730pm but stayed for the closing. if i have to stay for closing too how?? i duno if i can man!! especially on sats!! i have to go church!! i haven been going man!! so guilty! never go for agape last sat too. pam did not go, lav did not go.. n so happen I did not go!! grr!!! how interesting!! uncle joe said the gang leader nv go the whole gang nv turn up! this sat the agape ppl going to malacca. me how?? whos in charge man!!! i heard its aunty irene. that will be fun i guess! but i still want that gang to cum!! u see they comprises the BIG group!! n w/o them.. a little quiet eh!!

I SO HOPE THAT CATHERINE DEBBS WILL BRING ME FRIES!!! cat cuming over to my place later!! n know what?? i m CRAVING for mac fries! how pathatic! hahaha!! i hope she bring me hot crispi fries!! CAT!! U BETTER REMEMBER MAN!! will have to remind her! grr. STM she have!

i miss playing netball! okay. very random!! i miss affair too!! i hope she will meet me to collect her prezzie! i duno what to give her man!!! haha!! if u know me well, i think u will know pretty much what i will give! yes!! so clever!! 1 _____ of ___ ____!!! very good!! HAHAHAHA!!

m bored man!!! nothing happened really! the same yest night for piano!!! katherine NAGG N NAGG N NAGG!!! what else man??? she thinks i dun wanna practise piano worr!! grr!!! she say i give her excuse!! no man!! i did not even say anything. i nv even open my mouth to give her any words to start of with! then when she nagging, i smile when she look at me. she ask why i smile.. hahaha!!! know what i tell her?? u want me to cry ma?? i cry u say i cry!! i smile u say i dun take things seriously!! OMG!! what u want me to do man??

okay.. not i pens off.. oh!! its hands off! i still thinking of my potential darling! i hope it works out man!!! but there is the parents part to conquer! gosh!! it will nv pass that stage!

Fairytales..

8:52 PM

yes! i sprain sumwhere. i think its a sprain. hahahha!!! amanda said it is. oh wells. it is not the sprain pain. its WORST! hmm. OMG!! how how? i m suppose to start work on tues man! now i carn work! u know what is my greatest fear? i fear that it is worst than a sprain. anywayz. yest was fun. to finally play ball again! yes. i called ms mak after i had a little lump which i was so scared that it will be a break! i called her and she say nothing to worry about. its internal bruise that is very close to the bone thats why its more painful! thank god i had ms mak n amanda's help man! carmen was not exactly helping tho. she said'' chermaine.. you leg very funny. the lump one in then out then in again!'' i was lyk ''just shut up! dun scare me!'' then after, i call ms mak! i dun think i will be in action for some time. OMG! it means to the piano n piano only. walking to my bed is really a very tiring thingy to do! OMG OMG OMG!!

oh.. i met junie at alex place AGAIN!! hahaha!!!

Fairytales..

8:44 AM

oh wellz. i duno why but i think i m having the feelings for him. but if it ever happen.. i will definitely be thrown out of the house! it will so be a no no thingy! i duno y.. its the adult thingy n the children will also have to follow their footstep n yupp.. believe n what they WANT us to believe! gosh! but the feeling is there... i duno. haiz..

today is the last day for the BnJ trng! i love it i guess. hahaha!! i duno.. i m very scared that i will be asked to quit! i have this feeling. i m also very scared of going to work! i m afraid i carn manage my work load for piano!

know what? i m scared for piano! i duno y.. but i m very scared! its like 3 weeks no lesson! n katherine wants to see HUGE improvement! n i m like nowhere near! n know what/. i haven master the 3rd piece, not practised my scales n sight reading! i duno what the hell i did man!! m i juz that slow in learning?i m lost man!!! really! i really wanna practise.. but tis juz getting there!gosh!!! help!!!

i m currently missing ppl... n getting pissed off with irritating ppl who appearently look dwn on others. to samuel : heyy. know what? its all paper chase. i m currently irritated with this gal who thinks highly of going into the worst JC in singapore. n know what? she is saying that uni carn take in everyone n therefor poly ppl will be negleted n only JC ppl will be taken in. see what i mean now by paper chase?? yes!! -end-

Fairytales..

5:35 AM

did not blog yesterday cuz i was very very tired!! had to do so many thingys! had to go to BnJ to work then came home to rush piano again!! today, i had to do the same thingy too. did not play piano. so guilty. think i m gonna live in guilt for the next few days! i just have to play my last piece to perfection!! thats it! i think i will take 3hrs tomorrow to play that! hmm.. i hope there is a game tomorrow! there is a little problem of not being able to get a court! i dun wanna disappoint everyone man!!

should i say ben n jerry's rocks? its lots of work! its more to it then what the eye sees man!! working there is tough! but oh wells.. who say working was ever easy? hahaha!! i have to do my piano later. try to book court! i really starting to hate it already! especially when i have piano this cuming monday!! OH... i found someone who can help me in my piano theory!! thank GOD!! thanks you jin!! hahaha!! i met wonderful people in BnJ. batch 14 ppl is cool i tell u!! hahaha!!! everyone is juz so wonderful!we ate a lot!! tell i feel like i had a blender in my tummy today! GOSH!!

tomorrow is another long long day! yawns! have test on ice creams again tomorrow! i dunno y.. it seems lyk i dun really lyk BnJ now. its juz seems lyk its so funny. its not just the ice cream n scooping. its the boss i think.. feel a little weird with him around.

i have lots of plans for the netball team! i really hope that it will turn out good man! netball rocks?? o wells.. when everythingy goes on right.. eerythingy rocks! why carn i be lavinia for a day?? bubbly n stuff n lyk even when there is a prob, dun take it as a prob.. so hating the way i think sometimes! well.. i just have to learn i guess! its the growing up pain?? mayb i will not go for agape this sat.. have lots of stupid piano to catch up with man!! o no!!

well.. just hear from hannah that there is a slight hope for the team to have a game by tomorrow. we will only know by 930 tomorrow! o man!! well.. know what?? i have to forget about that guy! my mom seriously dun lyk him. i duno y. juz the mention of his name make my mom's face look lyk chocolate fudge brownie and as long as the banana in the banana split! i duno why. i think i will just have to .. u know.. yupp!

gonna get my BnJ tees tomorrow. i m not exactly looking forward to tomorrow.. i m looking forward to next week tuesday actually! i duno y. o.. i ordered the mother's day cake too. i hope its good man! oh wells... i really duno what to blog. duno what to say! i only know that i feel DOOMED!

Fairytales..

12:22 AM

blogging for saturday:

it started off with a very fun day! seeing many people at the polling station. hmm. woke up real early to prepare myself for ben n jerry's interview with lavinia. woke up at about 830. got a call from lavinia at 8! gosh.. she's early man! it was a rainy day! hehe.

lavinia's daddy fetch us to cathy. fun ride. love the kind of fast driving. anywayz, edmund guy told me that he will not there soon. only at one. yupp. and lavinia n i decided to have a little brunch at starbucks! yes.. u guess it right..!! its BANANA MOCHA FRAPP!!!! hahahah!!! love it man! if only they had a little banana bits in it. it will be WONDERFUL!

went for the interview after at 1pm. coool man!!! i think the chances of working at ben n jerrys is pretty good. right lavinia?? hahaha!!! lavinia is scared of the open view lift!!! horrrrr!! smile.. yupp.. then went to PS to take prints!! n lavinia got so high with the new CD she bought!! n i still want o get my kelvin kern CD!!! he juz release a new album called imagination light. awwww.... he is cuming to singapore for a one night concert on the 17th may 2006!! so ganna go watch man!! well.. i haven buy his CD.. i forgot!!! bought piano stuff also!! so wanting to study piano!! i duno y!! i only juz hoping that she dun come on monday! i think she dun cum i will study one lor! anywayz... i m out of point!

in the night when i go to church. well.. it did not exactly turn out good. its cause of that guy! well.. i duno! anywayz, mayb its because i did not go for novena. i duno y but i dun wanna go. haiz. i think i m a real bitch larr.. but i really carn control myself. hayo!! anywayz, i left early to go to anan place to watch the results. n the weather yesterday was so freaking treatening. know y? the thunder is always going off the entire night. n know what? it did not rain in the end. reach my home at close to 3am. shower and stuff, blow hair, by the time, its already 330am. selp at about 340am. woke up today pretty early taking into consideration that i selpt so freaking late! okay. i really need to chill man! oh... i also brought home flowers. its sunflower! not one but 3!!! n in a bundle!! love it lots! hahaha!! yes yes!

today sunday..

its a pretty okay day. i still want to go get my kelvin kern CD. i still want to go watch his show! haiz! if only i can go larr! i calculated the amt of $$ i will earn in a mth. not alot tho. but at least i will not need to take frm my parents. hahaha!! sunday n got nothing to do. did not do much today! i did a little revision today for my piano. amazing ya?? yes!! anywayz, PAP came to do their victory parade on the hippo bus today. hmm.. around 4 plue close to 5 ba. pretty cool man!! the MP saw me at my room window n i wave to them. hahaha!! tho i dun really want them to win this GRC. haha.. its okay man!!!i will ba happy!! hmmm... :))

i wonder if i willhave the time to study piano if i start work. i really hope that katherine will not come anymore. at least i will want to study piano n practise! gosh!! anywayz.. i m really happy today!! noting much.. juz.. love me! pick me! choose me!! (grey's anatomy)

Fairytales..

4:47 AM

well.. tomorrow is gonna be a fun and exciting day!! will be going for interview!! woo hoo!! than will be going to lavinia's place for meeting. then will be having MAJONG game.. then will be going to church!! n in the night.. mayb if i m lucky, will be going to leslie's place.. n in the night at 10pm, there will be the polling results!! so excited i tell u!

hmm.. should i go to the bar tomorrow?? dun think my parents will actually allow. nothing much to blog today. except, i think i will be a very happy girl. thinking of working at BnJ makes me so so happy. than again, what about my piano? haiz.!!dun wanna think abt it man!

hmm... i actually went to run today! gosh!!! no wonder it rained! m so tired! yawns! i actually feel my tights n butt tightening! is that a good sign?? i guess so.. hahahaha!!!

Fairytales..

4:09 AM

i m only wishing now that everything will turn out good. hmm... i told carmen today already!! hehe. well.. i am really hoping that it will turn out right man!! hehe. i want to talk again tonight. welol.. i did nothing much today except to talk teach carmen geog. n I COPY NOTES FOR HER while she is SLEEPING man!! gosh!! she's such a piggy! hmm.. the way i copy her notes its so PROFESSIONAL man!! why didn't i think about that way to study for my os ar? haiz. if not i will want to study more lor!i wanna go study. hmm.. still thinking of my paths now.

o.. yest, i tok to that boy! that boy?? yes! he pissed me off again! gosh! he is stupid i tell u!! STUPID!he dun want to disappoint his parents because of a scholarship from a school which is not recognised in singapore. duh.. its not lyk he is having a scholarship frm NUS or NTU man!! its just shelton hes talking abt! gosh!! he is real stupid.

i receive a mail yesterday from mr imthiaz. only 6 ppl turn up for the meeting?? gosh!! know what? jess is not even informed! n that boy ask to freeze the council! what position is he in to make this kinda decision man!! i hate him!! he still try act cool to me yesterday on MSN!! he say..''i know ur still angry with me. thank you for ur advice. i will take your advice seriously. thank you once again.'' gosh!!! i duno what to say about him man!!! i m only hoping now that he really get outta of my sight!

okay. gtg now. only thing now is that i m hoping to talk to that boy again!! missing the other boy. well.. mayb is not much of a boy. its more ofa man!! argh!!!! miswsing that man!! hehehe!!!

Fairytales..

9:16 AM

was talking to my long lost friend samuel just now. its been a long time n yupp.. he grew up lots i tell u! i think the last time i actually talk to him face to face was when he was in pri sumthing. hahaha!! hes is a fun person to talk to man! i think i got him by surprise when i ask him what guys look for in girls. well.. i can only say that he is the only guy that gave me the answer that will totally convince me n i m pretty much taken aback for. that proves that he is a HC person!! hoho!! well.. school do really distinc one's personalities n character. i do strongly believe that! it shows alot. not pin pointing that some schools are no good. its just that i see.. better result schools really do carry substance students. and schools with do not have good students in terms of academic, they are good in person and the school one way or another plays a vital role in building up the student's character and the foresights of his/her thinking. well.. here is being very thick skin. hahaha. lavinia love to say that i am not fat. its just that my skin is very thick. thats y it just add up to the body mass! hoho. got samuel's number today. pretty happy. hahaha!! i dunno y.. but its juz seems that i dun wanna lose him again. well.. not in that terms of relationship like love. its just that it took me 10 yrs to find him.. to get his e-mail, find his friendster. i took lots of time to get hold of him. tho i never talk to him alot, i still miss him lots. well.. at least, over the past 10 yrs, i still think abt him.. the school he goes in sec n his io level results. thats what friends r for right? i have been going out with the gang and i really dun want him to miss out the fun together with his bro. well.. i guess its just gonna be very hard for the gang to accept them after 10 yrs not seeing them and both change so much!!! its gonna take quite sumtime also for the parents to accept that we have found out long lost friend! i love my friends lots!

Fairytales..

9:35 AM

the time has come. i have to let it go. i have to accept the fact that i m not that good afterall. i m not the best in the crowd. i m infact the worst. the last in the class, the last in leadership. i m just no one but a person who is seeking for love from the ppl i love the most. slowly, everything is just disappearing. and its happening very fast. m i not good enough for you? m i not good enough as her? whats the difference between these 2 human beings? i want to give up on everything. i need a holiday. to a place where i can call my home. where i dun have to think about things except how to spend my day.. should i watch the stars in the night? should i go to the beach in the day to tan and at the same time to catch up with nature? life is moving so fast here that even the boys are only looking for 1st impression. i am just confused. what do people have that i don't? why do u want to look at my looks before looking at my character? am i not good enough as a person? yes. she is better. the other girl is good too. they are all better then me. but then again, is there others still better then the girl? i should not let this affect me. i should just let it all go. when it comes, it comes.

sorry.. i m just rubbishing.

Fairytales..

3:07 AM

was like 2am when i came home frm church DND. gosh!! its very fun man!! dance so much. did not eat much tho. had a little beer. lavinia n i gone very very high!! hahaha.. she is crazy! keep taking pics of herself. hmm.. i love the dancing part the most! know what? that idiot boy, touch me twice! stupid boy! hate him lots man! keep getting me to drink wine! get lost! u got ur luck draw prize n just go home! he is such a turn off man! know what? he drink the source from the plate!! like drink drink! literally! so turn off man!! ewwwwww!talking about lucky draw! i did not win any! gosh! lavinia won a 18k gold panden n she gave it to me cuz its i think the picture of our lady of sumthing. i duno who. but tis the catholic thingy thats y she give it to me. haiz. why why?? know the lucky draw ration is 1:3. meaning, every three person, one will win! n I DID NOT WIN ANY!!! nevermind... hahaha.. i had fun n had lots of pics! thats the most important thingy of all man!! hmm.. i m so so tired still! well, if there isen paul, i think it will not be so fun. dance so much with him. dance one song with trevor. did not talk to pam tho. the only thing she said was.. there goes my 1st prize! haha. hmm.. i really hope there is one more such event man!! know what? i m so looking forward to procession now. the next big event! o.. i so love mark!! n i so love bernadette! well.. brian too! hmm... our table was pretty okay. they dun eat much. i think if there is a table prize called who have the most food left, i think my table will win!! hoho! i hate that boy!! grr! n he can win such a nice thingy! he won a statue!!

did my BnJ resume! i so hope that i can start work this sat man!! i hope they call me in for interview soon! i want this job!! i just so badly want it! hmm.. i want to work larr, i will continue to do part time even if i m studying uni already! hehe. i do hope i can manage it man! hmm... i m trying to forget that there is a meeting this wed. i really dun wanna go to that school already. as much as i want to help, i dun see anything moving. so, what is the point right? i told lilian about it also. she totally understands! i m glad she does man! if not, i really have to do lots of explaining.

did not know that to do a DND requires so much rubbish! juz one person, the whole DND could have been gone! thank god we have a strong committee of ppl to work even w/o that particular sumone. hmmm. i m so looking forward to this year's procession. yah man!!! okay... today is may day!! tomorrow i have to get down to PIANO!!! sick man!!! yewwwwwwwww!!!

Fairytales..