you're a mystery yourself

Friday, October 27, 2006

10:50 PM

i m sorry. =(
just be with me and i will be okay!

piano exam in a few hours.
i m screwed! (i think)

Fairytales..

10:23 PM

i never knew that a show can have so much impact on me. its really unbeliveable. mayb its because of what i m going thru now. i want to find my tai zi. u know. the one n only?? i m watching my mvp valentine. finally got to watch it thanks to mayvina. =) i want to find a bf like duan chen feng. loving xiao xi unconditionally. and at the same time, handsome and stay cool at all cost.. =) both of their relationship is so funny. its always on the rock n no matter how much effort they put in. i believe, no matter what, there will be this one bad person who wants what u have n will spoil the perfect picture. at this point, it is voiced down to trust n all the years of relationship. in the show's case, its angel. its only right and human nature. its like animals do what they do naturally in captivity. oh well. like what mayvina said.. its a show.

i dreamt of the same dream twice and i think it is of a different perspective. basically, i was at australia's dream world and i was swimming with whales and specifically killer whales. the black n white ones and there is this trainer. the best part is that i m with aussie ppl. i duno who they r and i never met them b4. mayb one of the trainer looks like a vet when i watch animal planet. HAHA! anywayz.. here is the interpretation. its pretty scary.
whale:
To see a whale in your dream, represents your intuition and awareness. You are in tuned to your sense of spirituality. Alternatively, it indicates a relationship or business project that is too enormous to handle. (so true right?? hmmm)
amusment park:
To see or be in an amusement park in your dream, indicates that you need to set some time for leisure and more enjoyment in your life. Consider how everything in the park is an expression of some aspect of yourself. Alternatively, you may be too easily distracted lately

i m going thru this emotional rollarcoaster. i m not okay. i m really not okay. what i did yesterday was really wrong. i m sorry, i lied to u, telling u that i m okay. oh man!!! in a day i committed lots of sin! its really bad.. i think my karma is so down. it will come round. one day, i will have to pay what i did. the kind of rejection i gave was seriously wrong. i did not even give a chance, i told mr P off, i broke his heart with my hursh words my harsh tone, my ignorance. not that i like him but hey.. i just till now can't believe that i did sumthing so mean n evil. thanks mayvina for being there with me all this time. i m confused.

tomorrow is friday. a day closer to piano theory exam. i can do it man!!! this is what i always wanted. to finish my piano up. but know what? i duno y but it seems so hard to part. to part with the person that i always want out of my life. and ironically, its the same person who got me my distinctions, and passes for m exams. confusing right?

i finally ran today. its a fine weather. my MP3 player was right beside me the entire day! gosh.. never once i have my MP3 player beside me for so long. i m still listening to it. when i was running, i dun feel so tired like i usually do. i duno y. i did a pretty long run and i m very sure that i m gonna ach badly tomorrow. thank god i m not working. studying with mayvina tomorrow at GWC TCC again. she gives me the motivation to study man!!! =) when i was running, i thot of how horribe i m. how i actually say a big huge NO! so not me but yupp. i did it and i m feeling awfully guilty and sinful. at the end of the day, i just think of how my friends help me thru it. thanks to samuel and mayvina. lots of thanks. =) i so hope that mr P will never find me again. ever again.

this is a long long long post. oh man! i m on a rollarcoaster ride. super emotional day. oh man!

Fairytales..

2:30 PM

i will just reject.
i will reject today.
no plan B.
only plan A.
gosh.. this is gonna be hard!
no gay eh!!! MAN!!! HAHA!! =)

i want to run.
the weather is threatening.
i m getting weak.
i need training.
i find the netball heavy!! (thats horrible)
i want to go out n study.
home is just too home-y.
i only got one more exam n i m done!!!
n i pass my piano practical!!! (well done)

chermaine needs to find the courage to say no n at the same time, dun feel bad.
chermaine believes in karma!
karma karma karma!!!
it will come around.
for me..
it came......

Fairytales..

5:03 PM

i seriously dun mind being friends but know what? mr p is really scary. not in the sense that he will eat me up but in the way that he behaves. this is horrible. i have ppl telling me to just reject. n i have ppl telling me to just tell him off n dun bother about his feelings. i m not obliged to bother. its true but i really can't do it lar! its just too mean. actually... i think the way i think of mr p is alreay super horrible. i should never ever think of sumone just by looking n listening. omg. i have so no rights to do sumthing like that. but know what?? i did. i tought of it. n i m sure. it will never happen. i duno how to say. only to wait now n see what happenes next. omg... every msg is letting me know that i m closer. mr p is closer to get his wish n i m closer to break his heart. gosh.

Fairytales..

10:21 PM

Right… today is deepavali!! Woo hoo.. DOUBLE PAY!! =) alrights.. today’s crowd is crap.. tons of human beings. HAHA! Oh… also… I LOVE cold food. -.- yes… EVERYTIME… I dun get to finish up my food. The human beings will FLOOD in at the wrong time. Gosh… grr… anywayz.. it was really fun having to eat n run to serve n yupp.. I love cold food as a result. =)

I did cookies again today. n its Saturday… gosh… ask about piano homework.. not done. Ask about revision.. not done too… yawns. Life is a little miserable when it comes to exams. I TOTALLY understand u ppl out there having to go throught O n A levels. Yes mayvina… n ur exams too… hehe. I love cookies baking. Giving one bottle to Katherine. Hope she likes it. Hmm.. today’s cookies was a little weird. It was huge.. n soft n salty. Ya… I duno where the salty part came from. Gosh… I need gallons of water to take the salt away form my mouth when I eat the cookies!!

Mayvina n I had lots of fun today. n I got a song… dedicated to ‘IT’ I know.. its M-E-A-N but HEY!!! HAHA!!! Heres how it goes… the first part is the “original” then I corrected the back part cuz mayvina forgot as usual!!

To IT:
Nobody likes it
Everybody hates it
He’s gonna eat some worms
Fat one skinny ones
Tall ones short ones
N top up with lots of germs!!!

N to mr P
I really hate him
And since he listens to me
I will make him eat worms!!
Thick and juicy ones
Sticky and slimy ones
N top up with TONS of germs!!

HAHA!! Right… mean me… oh man!! Kama is going D-O-W-N!! alrights… I will head to piano now!! YAWNS!!! =(

Toodders!!

Fairytales..

11:56 AM

F.I.R - 天天夜夜 [KTV Version]

i love this song thanks to mayvina!! =)

Fairytales..

11:30 PM

HEYY!
Yes… today is BIG day, had lots of fun! Thanks guys! Really love this very day.
Started of with having lunch with lavinia and then meet up with ruby for pool. Hmm… n ruby n I went for ice cream at BnJ!!! Yupp… n its being PAID for?? OMG~!!! I thot it was mr P but no!!! its my dearest lavinia! =) thank you so much!!! The went to my grands place to have dinner n to cut cake n yupp… I love Aden. He is so adorable n cute n blah blah!!! Yippy!! =) so.. in the night.. went out with Candice n mayvina to this pub at Holland. Hmmm…had Singapore sling. Yummy!!! HAHA!! N yes!!! I m loving the super cold place. I was freezing n next time if we go there again.. I m sure to sit inside!!! N mayvina lie to me!!! Oh wells. Not lie lar…lie to SURPRISE me!!! I was so touched.. teared a little… =) I still hate u mayvina!! Really love it lots! Tho hate u still! Grr… n affair!!! How can u lie to me… but it was a good thing too!! Thanks for the cake mayvina!!! Oh.. did Candice share with u?!?! hmm… anywayz… thank you for the super filling cake. I probably gonna have it for breakfast lunch n dinner for the next 2 days lar! HAHA! Anywayz… thanks to EVERYONE who msg me n send me birthday greetings and wishes. Love all of it n REALLY appreciate it LOTS! Thank you so much. Unexpected once too.. but hey!! =)) walked and bus home with affair n tada… saw 2 cockroaches. Yewwww… n after talking to her at the void deck..(not exactly) I picked up 2 bucks on the floor!!! HAHA!!! Lucky me… oh wells. that’s all I gotta say.. I love this day!!! =)))))))

Fairytales..

9:00 AM

4 more hours to the BIG 40 marks worth final exam!!! ARGH!!! this is C-R-A-Z-Y!!! yes. i duno y m i doing psychology again!!! i can't fail i can't fail!!! i just got most of my results which is like horrible! n i seriously have to pass this freaking exam to actually pass my entire exam. not hoping too much. just a pass will do. can't do hopings now. yawns. now only can try to REMEMBER all that i forgot!! i have to go MEMORISE memory AGAIN!!! n i m pretty confident in intelligence n neuroscience! oh man... this is not good. i almost totally forgot all about MCQ questions. argh. anywayz... this guy is driving me crazy!! up the steepest cliff and tada!! i dun like him n he is pretty persistent! gosh...

tomorrow=big day!! YEAH!!! can't wait! WOO HOO!!! i need the zoo.. its the place where i can just be natural. yupp.. do u know that the steve irwin's dvd of his memorial is like $31 aud?? it increase price OVERNIGHT!! yupp.. overnight... n i have to play almost 10 bucks MORE!! not good... the conversion is horrible. i think its like 1.4 now. yawns.

i hate the haze. haze haze go away. it driving me kuku. oh.. n i need to study piano after today. got the equal amount of work to study. actually... more. i need this qi... to pass ALL my exams. oh god!!! bless me!

TTFN... will blog again tonight. i feel lazy-ly hard working.

Fairytales..

9:22 AM

this is just horrible. this guy is REPORTING to me. yes. literally. oh man~ when i say i will be friends i dun mean to that state lar! OMG~ anyways... exam is like tomorrow! YAWNS!! yes!! n i duno y in the world i m taking psychology. seriously.. i dun mind but the study load is like WOW!!n it is still like wow even thot the lect told us what to study and what is gonna be out lar! this is just super duper crazy! i want to go back to sec school! just remembering the sec school days makes me so happy. er... exclude the playing of politics part. thats horrible. yupp. life got to get on i guess. i m like forever in this state of not being able to grow up. HAHA! i think its terrible. i can't let go of the past but i m looking forward tot he future. huh? yah.. huh!!

tomorrow's exam i hope is gonna be pretty understandable. the other time, it was totally un-understanderable. its pretty terrible the other time. i can't afford to fail this exam. its gonna be like the most impt exam of the year. or rather.. one of the most important exam of the year. mayb i should just crap. lecturers and markers seems to love crapping. i duno y. got one more qn of piano to do. thats another super dreading thingy.. that exam is AFTER my psych exam. how interesting eh. haiz.... oh wells. gtg mugggggg now...

here is come...
TATA!

Fairytales..

1:50 PM

THANKY LOTS RUBY!!!!

when it comes it comes.
when its here.. just accept it.
ask for HIS guidence and u will get what is best for u.
as for now,
i will just wait.
if its mine, its mine.
the hint wil be super duper obvious that it can't be missed.
so... mayvina... u can just wait for my answer. =)

Fairytales..

1:11 AM

just talked to mayvina. i tell u... i m thinking so much now. heard my dad's voice just now too. omg. i tell u.. my mom is really having a good life. y m i thinking so much about XXX??why? omg.. i tell u.. this is getting cray. too crazy. i can't like XXX but i think i still like XXX!!! but i tell u.. i dun!! oh man.. i m one confused kid!! haiz... this is so confusing. y do i have to play such games? tell me why do i have to always [play games! i seriously hate games like that. its no fun!!! i have waited so long. but itsw not coming... i do hope when it comes.. it is a real good one. OH MAN!!! i think i m going gaga!! this is funny!! seriously. i just have to post this! i duno y the feeling is back. the feeling of want n the feeling of loneliness and the feeling that i need someone to love me! gosh... this is a darn weird post. watever lar... this is me for tonight!

TATA!

Fairytales..

10:13 AM

OH MAN!!! i tell u... phew... yesterday was a super duper crazy day.. hmm... i think today will be even crazier. yawns. yesterday... i was ALONE in the shop for like almost 2 hrs. tkns to uncle francis. i gave him a promotion yesterday since he is doing so much work for the shop. he is being promoted by chermaine from uncle to ah pei!! HAHA! omg... this is funny. anywayz... i m really dreading work today. tho its like i m taking charge cuz the other 2 is still pretty new. i tell u... i can go home at 11 plus tonight.. y?? those 2 ppl... they do things super duper slow. i think i will b darn tired. yawns. to think about it makes me sleepy. anywayz... i really admire my class man!!! they r like sharing infors n exam tips n the possible qns thats gonna appear. wow... love them to bits... actually not everyone lar. some of them r like me. just sit n wait for the tips to fly in. HAHA!!! but hey.. i already did my research n compiled all my notes okay!!! i m gonna get doen to real study tomorrow. i still have to compile a little bit more notes. omg... this is so fun eh... i thot in uni, everyone will be protecting their notes. HAHA!! i still wanna go to the zoo mom... mom... do u want to be ah ma?? cuz my suppose to be sister wanna be my daughter. yawns... i dun want to be mom yet... ARGH!!! HAHA!!! zoo or underwater world n dolphin lagoon??? wow.. thinking FAR man... HAHA!!! alrighty... TATA!!! just give me 2 days piano theory.. i will attend to u shortly. yawns. =)

Fairytales..

3:34 PM

i m so bored man!!! omg.. its like so many thingy to do but just dun have the mood to do anything. this lazy curse/spell must go away from me fast!!! in a weeks time.. gonna have psych exam. hmm.. then in 2 weeks time.. will be having the super dreading 3 hrs of piano exam on a SATURDAY!! yes.. n then.. i will be so free.. n only have to work. n it will be back to school for a chong-ing 10 weeks b4 its exams again! right.. my life is going at super duper fast rate..!! now.. i want to go zoo again!! yawns. HAHA!!! me n my zoo.. who shall i go to zoo this time with?? mayb sis.. mom.. n DAD!! MUAHAHAHAHA!! yupp.. lets see if ah ma wants to go too.. =) not the time to think of such stuff now actually. its time to think how in the world m i gonna do my atonal melody writing.. yawns to think about it. hmmm. i m thinking of stc the canteen now. duno y have such a random tought also. yawns... till we meet again!!! =)

Fairytales..

12:00 PM

YEAH!!! its thursday!!! n m gonna meet mayvina in a while. HOHO!!! n tomorrow i m meeting mayvina again!!! YEAH!!! n tomorrow its papper lunch. my love!! =) oh wells.. its thousday. the very last tut for this module. this is going so freaking fast man!!! OH MAN!!! its like poof.. n ne module is GONE!! i need to breathe. hmm... n piano exam is getting near too!! N MY BIRTHDAY TOO!! right.. shhh.. HAHA! oh yes.. talked to 'it' yesterday and the day before. i feel so bad to call it 'it' leh.. but i have to. HAHA!!! cuz i duno if it is him or her. oh man. this is so wrong. anwyayz.. did my short essay today. i duno what was i writing actually. HAAH! just did some intelligent copying form the super long essay. hmm... i think i love writing essays now. it gets me thinking n quick on my toes. er.. what does it got to do with the toes?? HAHA! right.. hmmm... actually... i m so not looking forward to todays tut. if i can pon i will pon already. but today they r gonna tell us what to study for the exam. yes. exam. this is so not good. i haven been touching my psyc text. only touch alot of piano textes.. HAHA! tao gays are funny little things i tell u. i even dreamt of my exam yesterday and my examiner was a BBK or was it a BBJ??? hmm... in any case.. it was weird, i thot it was real lar. i even heard the music n i was asked to tell the modulation n i was like huh?? wth.. yupp. worked yesterday with michelle. HAHA!! its so fun. so many funny thingys happened. n yupp.. the crowd as usual only appears at830-930pm. i duno y man!!! i dun like to do closing. its so tiring. n i sanitised all the tables n chairs yesterday!!! WOW!!! i never do that for a long long long time. dun like outside lar. HAAH!! n when i sanitise the tables n chairs, i remember about mayvina telling me about her fouth fingure being winkled when she touch the sanitiser stuff. she''s one weirdo. HAHA!! yeah.. the haze is pretty much gone. i can breathe more O2 now! HAHA! oh wells. =) gtg prepare now. ttfn...

Fairytales..

11:33 PM

wat have i been doing... hmmm... nothing. still feel so nua! gosh... its only MONDAY!!! oh man.. i need to train!!! i can see my fats poping out more than ever.. my once upon a time little muscles are almost gone. i m basically FAT!! yes.. the F word that ladies so HATE hearing n seeing n more so BELIEVING!!

still have one more essay to do. ayah.. thats pretty easy. just copy n paste. but its difficult too.. HAVE TO BE INTELLIGENT!! copy the right stuff. damn... i m running out of time!!! i realise now that i can't burn midnight oil. not good man!!! when i need the time.. physically i m not up for it. this is pissing me off!

anywayz... only this week. last week of tut n TADA~ its gonna be EXAM time!!! yawns... struggling for the next less than one mth n i will b FREE!!! YEAH!!! then i can work more.. crack my brain for more useful stuff and and... prob have time for trngs!! =))

anywayz.. i think its also cuz of the haze!!! DYING FROM IT I TELL U!!! my life expectancy is SLOWLY decreasing!!! thanks to mankind! oh man.. what about the poor animals!!! (random thought)

i feel so much like i m talking to myself! oh man!!! yawns..

BYEE NOWW!!! =)

Fairytales..